Hills and Bracelets.

Alright so, I balled out of control today. Hill repeats and I was getting some major flight and moving pretty good for a giant beast.

In other news, I just got suckered by the EFX bracelet scam. Perhaps you have heard of it. If you have, you are no doubt ROFL at me. Understood.

A guy showed me the bracelet and we did a stretch test. I got 2-3 more inches of stretch and actually touched the ground! I have never touched the ground! I really mean never. Not sure why or how... but it was repeatable and continues to work. It didn't work with other 'fake' bands either...

We tried it out on a variety of other balance related tests and it is a complete bogus thing and doesn't remotely help...but the fact remains that I can touch my toes with it and I can't without it. How the hell could this be? It doesn't make sense. My placebo loving brain is screwing with me as we speak. How could it be a placebo for one thing but completely bungus for another?

Apparently this braniac got suckered too... I felt so much worse after seeing this picture. You can officially lump me into a group with Lefty. We are lemmings together.

Off to the pool. Naturally I am probably going to drink some chlorinated kool-aid.

Slaying it on PCH

I have been using my full race setup lately as I haven't gotten around to replacing the tubes in my flat training tires. Lazy. The zipp 808 powertap combined with the joule powermeter keep training fast and interesting. I am starting to really love seeing all my numbers instantly. Especially when the numbers are big.

Today I did a 2.5 hr ride. The first 2 were moderate-hard. Here are the numbers from the 2 hr segment:

Average HR: 153 bpm

Average Cadence: 77

Average Power: 306 watts

Average Speed: 24 mph

Super windy so I am stoked with the speed. The wind got me through 40k in something stupid like 56 min only averaging 295 watts. I was like a sail. Then the wind turned on me and it was super slow but still the power was there.

I am moving pretty good right now on the bike.

Intervals?

I haven't really done proper intervals on the bike in a couple years. I am starting into them and *shocker* they are incredibly uncomfortable. I just did 10 x 2 minutes at 405-415 watts and it absolutely turned me inside out. I felt like my intenstine was going to come out my nose. I was snarling and spitting aggressively (but in a playful manner) sort of like Animal from the muppets.

Either way the watts were balling and I didn't fade terribly. Roughly 10-15 watt drop on the last 3 intervals. The wind was stupid too. 22 mph with gusts at 30 mph. That is a lot to handle when going downhill at 35+ mph. My bike felt like it was trying to throw me off like some sort of demented micky. Overall excellent workout. I am happy to be coming into a recovery week.

20 min TT

Another 20 minute TT... all I can say is wow those things sting the hell out of your legs. I felt like a vile animal with about 5 minutes to go. I had no idea of the amount of snot I could generate if forced. It is remarkable. I rode by a man walking his dog and he recoiled in disgust as I gnashed my drool-covered teeth and blew snot all over my jersey.

I tried to start out sort of conservatively as I was trying to negative split. FAILED. The goal was 350 watts and then build but for some reason I just can't hit that wattage consistently. I am between gears or something. The first 10 minutes were around 377 watts. The second 10 were just an exercise in holding on for dear life and fighting with the bike. I never seem to win that fight.

I ended with an average of 368 watts for 20 minutes! 2 watt PR. I wanted to validate my previous test as it seemed high. I hit it spot on. BALLIN

I wanted to vomit after. Well... I felt like vomiting. I didn't particularly want to.

Jarrod Shoemaker Gets His Cookies RAN as he qualifies for the US olympic team. JARROD-ERES UN ANIMAL ASCO.

Interview with Terenzo Bozzone

BOOM! Opening the New Year with a killer interview. We are with one of my favorite athletes TERENZO BOZZONE. He is 25 and already has won world championships at several distances. He also has one of the most remarkable performances in all of triathlon history in his course record at Wildflower. He is currently setting his sites on Kona. Let's catch up with Terenzo...

JP: Terenzo, thanks so much for taking the interview. Let’s jump in, how did you get into triathlon?

T: I have always loved sport, and had always swam, but whilst wakeboarding as a kid I popped an ear drum and was forced out of the water for a while, so I picked up Duathlon. Which has evolved into triathlon and i have never looked back since.

JP: What was your best early memory at the races?

T: Winning the 2003 Triathlon World Champs in Queenstown, NZ

JP: To date one of the most impressive performances in triathlon history is your course record in Wildflower. That was absolutely stupid fast. Walk us through that day…

T: Just a perfect day, one every triathlete hopes for but struggles to find. Preparation went perfectly and my body just handled everything I gave to it. Let’s hope I can have more of them to come.

JP: You were originally a smoking fast short course boy. What was your experience like with ITU?

T: I enjoyed the speed and excitement of shorter races, but I like the lifestyle and freedom of the long course races.

JP: What lead you to transition to longer stuff?

T: Missing out on the Olympics was a big factor. However, after deciding to get into the long distance format it has become clear to me that at the end of the day legends are made on the lava fields in Kona!

JP: You have showed massive versatility over all distances but what type of race is the best for you?

T: I love everything about triathlon, swimming, biking and running. So I guess any distance is good for me as long as it is tough.

JP: Switching gears a bit, you seem to be into the social media with an awesome twitter account, a great blog, and a facebook page where you do some awesome product giveaways. What draws you to this form of media?

T: The social media aspect is very important to me, as its all about the fans! We as pros have a responsibility to grow the sport. My website, facebook fan site, and twitter are very accessible options for most to follow me. Let’s hope it inspires future athletes into this great sport.

JP: Word on the street is you did a lot of training with Macca this year. What is it like to train with him?
T: Macca is a good guy, there is never a dull moment and he is always willing to help.

JP: Bottom line is you are training with a competitor. Do you guys get into serious competition in training and try to one up each other?

T: No not really. He is near the end of his successful career and I am just getting going. There’re not many pros over 40 and not many Ironman World Champs under 35. So we have quite a good combination going.

JP: It seemed like a rough day at Kona. What was your race experience like?

T: Well a rough day it was. I thought I was in a much better position going into the race, the body felt stronger than ever, but for some reason or another it didn’t click on race day. That’s racing though. It’s these experiences that help me to learn more about my body and hopefully I can use them to win in Kona in the future.

JP: What are your goals for next year and what is it going to take to get it done?
T: Win a full distance Ironman, and a top 5 at Kona.

Lightning round:

Weight gain in the offseason or stable weight year round? Haha, weight gain of up to 5kgs in the off season.

Favorite race? That’s hard, I love racing throughout the world, and all races have something different about them which I love, but if I had to pick one I would say the Philippines 70.3 Not only was the race awesome, but the people there were so kind and genuine, I loved every minute.

Predict Lance Armstrong’s time in Kona if he races this year. That’s tough. I would think he would be competitive with Chrissie.

Chocolate or coffee? Why not both?!

Beer or wine? Again both!!

Job if not a pro triathlete? I have completed 2 years of a Physiotherapy degree here in NZ so if I wasn’t a pro triathlete I probably would have finished that. If triathlon was never in the picture growing up I always wanted to do Medicine.

JP: Thanks SO MUCH for the time, T. Last question, who are the sponsors who keep you going?

T: My sponsors are great, and I choose to be in partnership with them as I believe they are the best, and can help me be the best I can. They are K-Swiss, Plumbing World, Felt, Nutra Grain, Biestmilch, Profile Design, Aqua Sphere, Oakley, SRAM, Fuel Belt, Lazer, Triathlon Lab, Zipp, Prologo and Sidi.

Again, for more info on Terenzo, check him out. He does some cool stuff from race reports, product giveaways, and live race play by plays on twitter.

On Twitter

On facebook

Personal Website

20 min TT

Super delayed but I thought I would share anyway.

About two weeks back, I used my Joule and powertap to do a 20 minute time trial effort per Ms. Jill Savege's orders (my new coach). I did it on the Cycleops Powerbeam trainer to validate the data. It started out decently and I was seeing pretty high numbers. After 5 minutes I was feeling that battery acid pain. I didn't think I would make it. I almost cut it at 8 minutes and then again at 10 minutes. I was pushing between 380-400 watts through 10 minutes which is enormous for me! Keep in mind, I am very big so the watts look more impressive than they are. The pain and lack of fitness set in and my watts dropped off big time. I was staring at 330-350 and starting to feel the acid creep into my arms and up into my neck...very bad feeling. 18 minutes in and I was hanging on for dear life. Light at the end of the tunnel kept me from upchucking.

I ended with an average of 366 watts for 20 minutes! This is a huge improvement for me especially when unfit. 2 years ago when I did this test last, I put up something like 308-312 and that was way more fit.

After I had cold sweats and was sick to my stomach. I almost chundered.

If you aren't familiar with power then this probably doesn't make sense but power is cool so go snag a powertap and get training.

Just thought I would toss out a triathlon related post as my writing for the last little bit has been... nonsense.

OH YEAH NEW YEARS YEAH

Hey guys! I am back... Just in time for you to begin your weak attempts at new years resolutions. Now, many of you think the trivial and cliche new years resolutions are the way to go. It seems everyone wants to get a gym membership, start volunteering, spend more time with family, live everyday like it's his or her last.... PUKE. Most don't stick. Let me enlighten you.... FACT: 93.4% of gym memberships are stupid. FACT: A gym is a festering den of germs, sin, and bacteria. FACT: Most people who go to gyms end up making their arms look like giant mushy hams instead of lean striated muscle.

Here's my take... if you are going to go down (all resolutions do) you might as well go down aiming high. That doesn't mean making your family volunteer at a gym for one whole day and then killing them. My opinion is that we all should resolve to try to become renaissance men and women. What does this mean? Well, my friends and I spent one drunk night coming up with a list of 10 qualities that are indisputable and should be treated as law. They are as follows:

1. Know tons of latin names of plants

2. Able to manage finances deftly...but knows how to make it rain when appropriate (see pacman jones)

No... I said, I'm NOT crazy! NOT crazy! Where's Roger Goodell? He can vouch for me.

3. Chops (musical, facial hair, etc)

4. Huge physical prowess. Able to go sub 9:25 in an Ironman.

5. Multi lingual.

6. Well read... it's ok to read comics or books with pictures sometimes but not always.

Gaston validates my opinion that Twilight is garbage and Stephenie Meyer should be put in prison for what she has done to a generation of youth

7. Discerning taste buds... but doesn't get confused by trends like drinking coffee made from cat poop.

I'm not sure if it is worse to be the first one to drink coffee from cat poop or if it is worse if you drink it thinking it is cool because it shows up in a trendy midtown new york coffee shop...

8. Super artsy but never breaks the law like those evil grafitti artists. Hey Banksy, next time write a letter to your senator you lawless goblin.

Check out what I did on the internet in 15 SECONDS!!!!! OH YEAH ARTSY YEAH!

9. Good with knives and other tools.

10. Super CURIOUS about EVERYTHING!!!!!

I've already done like everything on that list but that's neither here nor there. I just have to grow some chops and learn how to wield a knife. But this isn't about me. This is about you, bloggers. Get going.