Today was a fairytale

I WORE A DRESS! YOU WORE A DARK GREY T-SHIRT. YOU TOLD ME I WAS PRETTY WHEN I LOOKED LIKE A MESS. TODAY WAS A FAIRYTAAAAAALLLLLEEE.

Just thought I would get your attention. Taylor Swift is a talent that comes along once in a generation so you better be paying attention. Now that I have a captive audience, I'd like to tell you some cool news. Cait's back! The peck returned from Yosemite where she was chaperoning brats for a week. Yes, THE yosemite of "double rainbow" fame. If you don't know the youtube clip "double rainbow", it isn't funny. What is funny is she went through a week of the kids shouting double rainbow every five seconds and busting up laughing. I would have fit in well so I am planning on chaperoning next time.

I was pumped that she got back. So pumped that I went for a bike ride without her. Then we went hiking where I constantly reminded her of the double rainbow by shouting it every time we crested a hill. It's the gift that keeps on giving. OH MY GOD IT'S SO BRIGHT AND VIVID.

Brick is on the agenda today. Legs feel sweet on the bike especially.

Here's something that is actually funny. Little treat for getting to the end of yet another pointless post.

Ease up on the Gas. Grilled Cheesus.

I went flippin stir crazy during my recovery week. I was jumping out of my skin but my body was totally in the bucket and I was having trouble climbing out. Finally I came right just in time to hit some major workouts with my buddy from out of town... They promptly put me back in the bucket. Shit.

Instead of resting, I hit a huge speed workout on my bike that had me cross-eyed by the end... literally. It was just for a second but I was actually cross-eyed. Pretty funny and new experience.

I took a day to relax but couldn't help thrashing myself in the pool. Damn. Then feeling that pull and feeling a bit chubby, I hit another hard workout: 1 hr 50 min strong strong ride with big wind and some ok climbs then a 30 min hillacious run. Damn.

I got smart about getting back on track and ate super healthy, did the 30 min window of carbs and a bit of protein, then jumped in the pool and the hot tub to bob around and let my muscles chill.

I feel good today. Short nice and easy swim... no thrashing myself. Good. Trying to resist my running shoes calling my name. God. I need to ease off and I know it as I am trying to get fresh for Ironman but I can't for some reason. That's the problem with addiction, I guess. I would be a terrible heroine addict. Honestly though, triathlon is probably more expensive.

Unrelated. I have some book recommendations for those of you who geek out properly on endurance stuff.

1. once a runner (classic book about a miler... super intense and motivating read)
2. again to carthage (same miler transitions to the marathon... weird pacing and slow beginning but picks up)
3. simon says gold (kinda corny shit writing but cool to hear about simon whitfield in general)

I am about to start a book born to run, high crimes (mountain climbing), and then Mark Allen's new book... I'll let you know.

Good Weekend pt. 2

The next day Caitlin was off on a trip to Yosemite where she will be chaperoning a week long 8th grade field trip (read: getting paid to hike around in a national park). Me and Aaron connected with a lady near my house who has a 15,000 dollar titanium tandem bike. Sidenote: She is also Macca and Terenzo’s homestay and has all their bikes from Kona. Awesome to see.

The plan was to do a 60 mile ride then a 45 minute run. We headed over to her house. Turns out it is a ridiculous mansion, kitty corner from the Kardashians’ place. Weird. We tried to outfit the tandem as best we could but it was made for midgets and babies. I felt like I was on a tricycle but we got rolling. The gearing was paltry. They apparently run tiny teacup nancy gears instead of manly dinner plate gears and we spun out a ton. The rain was coming down as we headed around the Santa Monica mountains. Lots of climbing and 60 miles later, we jumped off and onto the run. The plan was to run at Ironman pace for a bit then turn the screws but we hit it hard from the gun. It was super hilly and we were both puffing by the end. We finished on an uphill and I was really happy with the effort 3 weeks out from Ironman.

We bounced back to the house and off to a hole-in-the-wall Italian place for dinner. I haven’t had pasta in 3 months and I basically inhaled it. I met a couple of his friends from the LA tri club and we geeked out on triathlon talk. Overall, amazing weekend with a good friend. The training was spot on and my legs are feeling good. 3 weeks to go...

Good Weekend Pt. 1

Finally my down week is over. I just started my last bit of training before Ironman. My friend, Aaron Scheidies, came into town on Friday. We had plans to meet up at the Distance Swim Challenge in Santa Monica the next day. I did a 2.4 mile race and he was entered in the 4.8 mile race. As I made my way over to the start, I saw him coming into the halfway point of his race. Keep in mind, Scheidies is visually impaired. I saw him coming in and I noticed that his guide (a kayaker) was following him. Not the other way around. This is a major problem for a blind person swimming in a very large ocean. He was snaking all over the place, apparently with designs of swimming an extra 2.4 miles just for kicks. The crazy thing was he was leading the race. Haha. Service to all able bodied athletes.

After watching him, I took off with about a group of 60 swimmers and got out past the surf break and quickly into a rhythm. I jumped on a train of two feet and sat in, still pushing to stay on their feet. We came around the 1.2 mile buoy and the train broke apart. The second guy dropped 15 m back and the lead guy went off the front. I was stranded in no man’s land as I headed into a “check point” halfway through. It was some sort of anal medical check on the orders of the LA life guard. Anyway, I headed back out into a big surf. This time, instead of slipping out of the surf like a baby dolphin, I was barreled 4 times like an obese hippo in the ocean for the first time. I lost 30 meters to the guy behind me and he hit the turn buoy up by 5 meters. In a blind rage, I hit the gas to regain my spot in 3rd. I swam hard for 100 strokes and flipped onto my back to check where he was. 8 meters back and swimming well. The good thing was I had enough of a gap so he wasn't drafting. We hit the turn buoy to the finish and I checked. He was 4 meters back and sprinting. I absolutely redlined, rode a wave in, and hit the beach. We almost reeled in 2nd place who was probably 100 meters up at the turn. I sprinted up the beach and promptly fell and ate a bunch of sand. I scrambled back to my feet, looked over my shoulder, and crossed the finish 15 seconds up and on the podium. I grabbed my knees and rasped for O2. Good race.

After, I talked to Caitlin for a bit and I met up with Aaron who was highly disoriented and chaffed all over his body. He had won the 4.8 mile swim! I also had a huge raw wound all over my neck from sand getting in the wetsuit and we griped to each other as we headed to Starbucks. Off to the awards and the VIP tent (Aaron is big business) where we met Marcellus Wiley (NFL player and ESPN analyst) who had just learned to swim and was in the 1.2 mile race, no doubt floundering like a wounded harp seal. Then we headed back to my house after collecting our prizes (floor tiles that had first place painted on them) and had a few beers.

Beans Beans the musical fruit

Not talking about the standard green bean that may or may not cause flatulence. I am talking about the bean responsible for the elixir of the Gods. The coffee bean may get a lot of love. But let me tell you it is STILL underappreciated. Here are some comments about the beauty of coffee.

1. Nothin gets my colon rollin’ like a huge cup in the morning…Sorry coworkers. You should thank your lucky stars for industrial flushers.
2. I would snort or mainline the beans if the drink weren’t available
3. No other substance could literally support a billion dollar industry that has representatives rivaling McDonald’s. Suck it beer.
4. Move over compulsive exercisers, because this is the most socially accepted addiction ever.
5. If you drink too much alcohol you are labeled an alcoholic and have to go to classes like a sucker. No such stigma for coffee drinkers. So go ahead, drink that whole pot you pathetic junkie.
6. Coffee smells better than everything. Nothing comes close…except apple cider and donuts but if you had those every day you would balloon up as fast as Eddy Murphy puts on a fat suit for money. It’s amazing how often he has tried that fat thing… Idiot.
7. Science rationalizes coffee ALL the time. It prevents gout! It’s an antioxidant! It reduces your risk of Gallstones! It makes you see Jesus! Science can’t stop thinking of weird ways that coffee is baller. I can see them all sitting around in lab coats, guzzling coffee, and as the time goes by they get more excited from the caffeine and more frenetic about their slanted research.
8. Coffee has improved ice cream, milk, candy, and has provided us with an enormous source of caffeine. We have impregnated a ton of different things with said caffeine that would otherwise be boring and not worthwhile. I feel like people who drink energy drinks are just being disrespectful.

I'm getting another coffee. BOOYAH

That time of the month

Harry Potter/Hugh Grant marathon!

In an effort to balance my highlight posting with lowlight posting, I figured I should give some insight into recovery weeks (hence the title) I'll give you sort of a timeline of the days leading up to it.


T-3 days to recovery week: Feeling like lead is pumping into my muscles. Heart rate doesn't make sense with effort level. Begging for time off.
T-2 days to recovery week: Appetite is kind of gone. Lower ass half sinks in the water and makes my pool workouts suck. Reluctantly eat some carbs to get ready for the next day.
T-1 day to recovery week: One more monster effort where I allow myself to be completely detonated. Can take this day as deep as possible. Generally feels like SHITE.


Recovery week! It sounds so nice. Sort of like vacation. Newsflash bloggers: I am in the middle of one and it isn't that cool.
My appetite returns like a demon straight out of Hitler's corner of hell and I spend nearly all waking hours either eating or thinking about eating. Nothing can stop me and once I get a taste of, say, popcorn, I won't stop til I have eaten at least 40% of the food that doesn't require any preparation.
My legs feel like cookie dough for at least 4 days if I am properly tired from the training.
My motivation sort of droops like a dead flower and I do very little in the way of being a contributing member of society.
Specific accomplishments in recovery week are basically limited to the following:
1. dressing yourself to go outside
2. stopping yourself from eating your own hand during a binge session
3. And the big one: watching every harry potter/ hugh grant movie in one week (sound impossible?)
4. Not napping every time you find yourself alone.

I snapped this picture just as Hugh Grant was launching his container of baked beans at me. I waited in his bushes for 6 hours and when I asked for an autograph and he gave me his dinner instead. He also verbally abused me and kicked me in the ribs.

Couple things

Couple things today...

My Mom told me to talk more about the women's race so, begrudgingly, I will. Why begrudgingly? Because the depth of the women's field is really weak in my opinion. That might not be fair as Chrissie may be the best women's athlete ever... so comparisons are a bit slanted... The men's field doesn't have a Chrissie but they have 20 guys who could win. Natascha Badmann could get away with swimming a 1:03 and still win the race like 6 or 7 times. That put her back like 8 minutes... in the men's race if you miss the front pack by more than 2 minutes you can kiss your race goodbye unless you plan on setting a bike course record. Sharpen up Yvonne Van Vlerken... Swimming over an hour is unprofessional.

No one can really touch the top 3 girls in the sport. That being said, the top three girls are RIDICULOUS. Sadly, Chrissie dropped out. Down to 2. Julie Dibens and Mirinda Carfrae...and they didn't let us down. Dibens popped out in the lead and proceeded to bike out of her mind. But Mirinda, with a much improved swim, was nipping at her heels. She unleashed on the bike (nothing compared to Dibens who looked super smooth and metronomic) and then went to work on the run... Holy god. Dibs was running really well but Rinny is in another area code. She took the win with a 2:53 marathon! 2:53 stacks up really well with the male pros.... it doesn't just stack up, she destroyed most of the male pro field on the run. Amazing race but you can't help but ask: what happens if Chrissie starts?

Second thing- Saturday was my final big day in my 3 week ironman build. 85 miles on the bike and 12 miles on the run at race pace. First 10 minutes on the bike and I knew my legs had not showed up to the party. Sluggish, gummy, and heavy. Not a good thing for fighting coastal wind. It didn't seem to matter though as my speed was fine. I kept the effort high even though my heart rate was super depressed from huge fatigue. I finished with an average of 23.4 mph! I hope this speed translates to Ironman because if I can hit a 23.4 mph average I am biking in the 4:40's... huge if.
The best part of the workout was getting off the bike, loading up with coke and setting off with fresh running legs. I felt really comfortable for the first 4 miles @ 7:29 pace. I loaded up with some more coke and stepped up the pace. Again, comfortable @ 7:25 pace for 4 miles... more coke and again, comfortable @ 7:14 for 4 miles. I started to feel the edge going 7:15's but I finished feeling pretty good, knowing I could do a buttload more if need be. Average for 12 miles was about 7:23's.

85 miles @ 23.4 mph
12 miles @ 7:23's

I've got to think that translates, right?

Next up- recovery week and then doing everything I can to be ready for the race.